Authors’ Note: 2.B.A. Master… bater is a work of parody. The AniMessenger asks those with their unmentionables in a bunch to kindly un-bunch them.
2.B.A. Master… bater
Chapter Three: An Electric Encounter
From the east, Ash heard a crescendo of disturbed leaves and broken twigs. Through the trees, a monstrosity appeared. A vision hearkening back to the Tauros tamers of old. The tamer yanked a chain-leash and kicked a tortured beast that limped ahead on all fours. As it walked into the light, Ash realized that the monster was actually a man clad in leather from head to toe—mouth zippered—with limbs wrapped in metal links. The tamer was a redhead like Misty, but with a violet tinge and chest-globes each the size of a Voltorb. She wore leather hemmed into a dress. Her low-cut bodice revealed cleavage begging for release, and her skirt failed to cover the bottoms of mesh panties. Her naked legs, capped by high-heeled boots, were adorned with spike bracelets. On the slave’s back sat a whip-twirling Meowth wearing a black leather speedo and an Officer Jenny cap. The gimp howled with pleasure as the cat-o’-nine-tails licked his rump like a multi-pronged vine. All at once, the sound of a tinny orchestra filled the air. The woman unzipped the man’s mouth-hole and they took turns chanting:
Prepare for leather.
And for pleasure!
To explore the depths of penetration
With ribbed black vibrators for masturbation!
To proclaim the uses of whips and chains.
Pull out anal beads as I scream in pain!
Team Rocket! Jack off at the speed of light!
Surrender now, you hermaphrodite!
Meowth: I’m tight!
Ash took a few steps back, struggling to process the unfolding performance.
“Meeeowth,” the cat Pokémon whined. “Whatsa matter, squirt? Cat got your tongue?”
“What are you people supposed to be?” Ash asked. “And what on Kanto is up with those outfits?”
“Hmm, typical,” James moaned. “A pipsqueak like you hasn’t gained enough experience to evolve into more advanced types of pleasure.”
“Pleasure?” Ash arched his eyebrows and gawked at Jessie’s bosoms, eliciting a rush from underneath his swim trunks.
“Don’t think we can’t tell,” Jessie purred. “You and that scrawny little carrot-top were all but copulating just a few minutes ago. We were spying on you from behind the trees.”
“Listen,” Ash said, “I don’t know what you want from me. But if you’re looking for a battle, then it’s a battle you’ll get. I gotta admit, though, you’re the weirdest trainers I’ve ever seen.”
The trio exploded into a cackle.
“Boy,” Jessie quipped, “we’re not trainers! We’re Team Rocket!”
“That’s right,” the gimp added. “And we want your Pikachu! Do you have any idea the kinds of things you could get that thing to do?”
“Okay, Team Rocket, whatever that is,” Ash chuckled. “I don’t know if you’re joking or what, but you’ll never lay your grimy hands on my Pikachu!”
“We thought you’d say that,” conceded the dominatrix. “James, it’s time to show this half-pint just how we intend to capture that electric rat.”
Jessie unhooked James’ leash and the Meowth hopped up and down, clapping its paws. Jessie tugged two Poké Balls from the fissure between her breasts and James dislodged one from behind his crotch-zipper. They flung all three orbs at once.
Two Koffings and an Ekans.
“Psh,” Ash scoffed. “Pretty basic Pokémon right there. You think you can beat Pikachu with those?”
The two Koffings conjoined, plunging their purple spindles into each other’s gas-holes. Each a poisonous testicle. The Ekans coiled around the scrotal chimera and straightened its shaft-body as the purple nuts lifted them all into the air.
“Now our Koffings and Ekans have evolved into a Penusaur!”
“Peeny-peeny!” the three-mouthed pecker groaned.
“Penusaur,” James erupted, “Do a Cumshot, now!”
A string of steaming white goop ejected from the phallus-mon’s throat. Ash hurled himself backwards as the splooge bubbled in a pile in front of him before eating a hole in the ground.
Ash reached to his belt and fumbled for a Poké Ball, but came up empty. He cursed to himself, remembering that he left Pikachu in charge of his gear while they swam. His heartbeat sped out of control, double-teaming inside his chest. Where had Brock and all the Pokémon gone? His eyes snapped from left to right, but his friends had vanished. Ash bolted towards the woods.
“Not so fast, twerp!” Jessie shrieked. “Penusaur, more Cumshots! Aim them at his head!”
The Penusaur’s acid stream tore orifices into the once beautiful Viridian landscape. Ash felt its stinging splatter-flecks on his legs and Pikachu yipped beside him.
His strength faltering, Ash wondered how it would feel to submit himself to the overwhelming power of the Cumshot. To himself become a hole—subsumed into nothingness—a gaping maw of death.
“Pika!” The lightning rodent yapped. “Pi-pika! Pikachu!”
Ash understood his friend’s complaints. They couldn’t give up now. They had too much to lose.
“Pikachu, I want you to charge a Thundershock while we run!” Ash shouted between his pants. “Can you do that?”
“Pika!” the Pokemon agreed.
Jessie cackled, not far behind, and James let loose a stream of moaning laughter as Meowth’s whips kept a steady crack on his rear end. But now Ash felt a new sensation beside the bite of the Cumshot residue. The hairs on his arms stood up as white flashes shot out from Pikachu’s fur.
“Okay, Pikachu. I’m gonna count to three and we’re gonna turn and shock him. It’s our only shot! You with me?”
The duo skidded to a halt and turned. The Penusaur bent its Phallic head towards them.
A shaft of lightning crashed down from the now-darkened heavens and engulfed the whole of team rocket in an electric energy bomb. With a deafening crack, the troupe of kinky clowns shot into the air, moaning, waling and shouting in unison:
“Team Rocket’s jacking off again!”
With a chime, the gang of miscreants diminished into the stars and sparkled away.
The boy and his friend collapsed onto the Forest’s welcoming bed. Pikachu cooed and shut his eyes, falling asleep on Ash’s chest. He pet Pikachu, his fingers crackling from the leftover static. Before submitting to the wave of fatigue crashing over him, he saw his friends, in the distance, running towards him and shouting his name.
He’d finally done something right.
And, please remember: